Cole Hamels bolts to the birthin’ room

My son was born the day after I saw “Batman Begins” at the theater. If he would have come sooner, Mrs. Shyster would have been on her own. They’re called priorities, Cole Hamels. Think about it:

Phillies starter Cole Hamels has left the ballpark with his wife, a former “Survivor” contestant, who is in labor with the couple’s first child.

Hamels gave up four runs and seven hits in five innings against the Rockies in Game 2 on Thursday. He left after throwing 82 pitches and rushed out of the dugout when he was pinch hit for in the fifth inning.

In other news, at least he now has a use for the minivan.


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The Rabbit
14 years ago

I wondered if you were comment on this.
On the basis of the interviews with Cole and the Mrs.that I’ve read, I wouldn’t be surprised if she planned this. It’s fairly obvious who is in charge of that relationship.
Note: As a female, if my other half was pitching in a playoff game, I’d be crossing my legs and phoning after the game. 
True story: I went into labor in the 4th inning of an APBA! game. (1973 Mets vs. 1973 Phillies) I wouldn’t go to the hospital until it was over. I lost 2-1 in the 9th and my excuse was that the pains were two minutes apart and I brought in the wrong reliever. The lines during games for years to follow were: “What’s your excuse?  You’re not in labor.”
I’m just glad that neither of us managed like LaRussa or the kid would have been teething before the game ended.

TC
14 years ago

I think I had a comment, but….

The Rabbit wins.

Anyway, if Hamels had been pitching well, I’ll bet that the Missus goes to the hospital by her lonesome, and Cole skips out of the postgame to be with her.  Giving up 4 runs, well, I’ll bet he was glad to get out there anyway.

But seriously.  The Rabbit wins.

YankeesfanLen
14 years ago

If Ol’ Cole were pitching better he wouldn’t have to jump into the worst Ford minivan ever, he could have chosen:
a) “I’se don’t know nothin’ ‘bout birthin’ no babies”
b) “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn”

And I agree The Rabbit wins.

YankeesfanLen
14 years ago

Oh, I forgot this observation: Now Heidi is screwing up baseball games too.

Kelly
14 years ago

The Rabbit wins thirded.

Maggio
14 years ago

So are you saying he should have stayed in the game instead of being present at the birth of his child? Really?

Craig Calcaterra
14 years ago

Maggio—I’m pretty sure that everyone is being pretty tongue in cheek here.