And That Happened

Orioles 6, Mets 4: Matt Wieters hits the first of what the prophecies have foretold will be a thousand career home runs, each more majestic than the last. The real story was the middle of the O’s order — Markakis, Huff and Mora — who combined to go 8 for 11 with four RBI.

Blue Jays 7, Phillies 1: I sat back on the couch and watched this game, hoping to relax after a long day. But then Sutcliffe and Co. start talking about the Jerod Morris/Raul Ibanez affair. Look, I don’t come into your house and talk about your work when you’re off, so what makes you think you can do it to me?

Nationals 3, Yankees 2: Wang pitched, but he was way less responsible for the Yankees losing than was John Lannan (8.1 IP, 4 H, 2 ER). Five run game, three of them scored on homers.

Angels 4, Giants 3: Six straight wins for the Angels, who hung around long enough to finally get to Tim Lincecum. It’s nice when you can pinch hit Vlad Guerrero and Torii Hunter late in the game.

White Sox 4, Cubs 1: Piniella after the game: “Danks pitched a good game, they executed a good squeeze bunt, and we didn’t do much offensively. That’s about it. That’s the ballgame in a nutshell.” Hey Lou, I do the recaps around here, got it?

Reds 4, Braves 3: Micah Owings’ three run homer was the big blow of the game. If he played for the Braves, he’d be the team’s second best outfielder in terms of OBP. Javier Vazquez has pitched better than anyone could have hoped entering this year, but the dude is still only 4-6 because, I dunno, the universe hates him or something.

Red Sox 6, Marlins 1: The Brad Penny trade deadline audition continues, with the commodity in question giving up 0 ER on three hits in five innings, though he had to make 100 pitches and gave up four walks in the process. David Ortiz walked twice, got a hit and scored all three times on base. Pedroia had a big game too. The team made a big deal out if it being the 500th straight sellout, including the fans in all kinds of fun. The game story doesn’t say whether or not anyone dangling their free tape measures or gawking at the giant “500” mowed into the outfield realized that the sellout streak is why they had to sell a kidney in order to buy their tickets on StubHub.

Cardinals 4, Tigers 3: A couple of Curtis Granderson homers aren’t enough for Detroit, as the Cardinals and Tigers trade little jabs all night.

Pirates 8, Twins 2: Andrew McCutchen over his first 13 games: .339/.381/.492. That’s better than Nate McLouth is doing, both on the season and since the trade. Are Pirates fans still supposed to be mad about this?

Rockies 5, Rays 3: David Price has to pitch in Coors Field. That’s bad. But he lasts a bit longer into a game than he has been lately. That’s good! He still gives up ten hits and five runs and loses the game. That’s Bad. But he gets more economical with his pitches, walking no one. That’s good! The postgame spread contains sodium benzoate . . . That’s bad. Can I go now?

Rangers 5, Astros 4: The battle for Texas rages on! So far, Houston is down 2-0. If they don’t turn things around soon, they’re going to be stuck with Texas.

Diamondbacks 12, Royals 5: Greinke’s return to Earth continues, as the Dbacks rough him up for six runs over six and two-thirds (four earned).

Brewers 9, Indians 8: Trevor Hoffman blew his first save of the season, but the Brewers pull it out in extras. And really, it’s the Indians’ bullpen that should be ashamed of itself, having given up 21 hits, 14 walks and 18 runs in 14 innings against Milwaukee.

A’s 5, Dodgers 4: Trevor Cahill started wild, but settled down and then somehow managed to survive three errors by his mates which led to three unearned runs. The A’s will take it.

Mariners 4, Padres 3: Rob continues to claim that the American League is “playing a different game” and “a better game.” And he may be right. But how much of that difference is attributable to the Padres alone? I mean, jeez, they’ve lost 13 straight games to the AL, and that sort of skews things a bit, doesn’t it?