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Monday, January 19, 2009
U.S. History as BaseballI've been known to stretch a metaphor beyond its breaking point, but this is downright bizarre.
I got through the Civil War -- well, at least I think it was the Civil War -- before throwing in the towel. Quick: someone with a greater attention span than mine -- tell me if they included the Taft-Hartley Act in this thing. It's one of my favorite acts.
Posted by Craig Calcaterra at 1:51pm
The first sentence is B.S. Once upon a time, the world was engaged in soccer, cricket, horse racing, “athelitics” as the British call it, and boxing, as well as baseball. Those 6, and only those 6, existed well through the 19th C. in the Anglo world. C’mon, Colin, if you are going to preach Christian libertarian history, get your facts straight. I mean, basketball, really? . . .
Posted 01/19 at 02:56 PM
I think you might owe me 2 minutes of my life back. I’ll have to consult my attorney.
Posted 01/19 at 02:57 PM
Posted 01/19 at 02:59 PM
But I guess “ping-pong” diplomacy plays better than “horse racing” diplomacy. Though, with all of the wars we have fought, one would think that boxing, an actual sport that has existed throughout the lifetime of the U.S., could find its way in that story somewhere . . .
Posted 01/19 at 02:59 PM
Take Seabiscuit in the 3rd at Aquaduct
Posted 01/19 at 03:29 PM
Jason B said...
Man, that was long and exasperating - like “Ulysses”, sans the whimsy.
Shoulda let Larry Burns try his hand at it—he gave his entire life story in 25 words. *And* it included a blimp-sighting.
Posted 01/19 at 05:15 PM
I’m thinking Colin had an interesting idea and then, when he tried to implement it, realized that he was stretching it a little. ‘A’ for effort, but, man, it got tough to follow after a while…
It reminds me of my freshmen year in college though. That was the year that Star Wars Episode 1 came out, and everyone was getting in on the excitement. For some reason, the Sporting News website wanted to get in on it too, so they asked their readers to submit clever ideas for how Star Wars and sports might intersect. Being a college freshmen who liked Star Wars too much and had too much free time on his hands, I decided to give it a try.
I re-wrote the Star Wars story as a hockey game. See, Star Wars is a trilogy, right, and there are three periods in hockey, right? It was perfect. Luke blowing up the Death Star was a break away goal as time expired in the first period… that kind of thing. I was excited to write it, but, really, it wasn’t all that interesting and, anyway, by the end of the “game”, I was obviously stretching the metaphor…
I have the story somewhere… I’m gonna try and find it. Anyhow, that’s what this article reminds me of, for better or worse.
Posted 01/19 at 06:29 PM
I’d like to hear Larry Bowa read this aloud
Posted 01/20 at 12:39 AM
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