My Morning in Exile

Don’t read anything I wrote this morning. Spend any free Internet time you have today here. You won’t be sorry. But when you get done with that:

  • In 1950 a new house cost $8,450.00, the average income per year was $3,210.00, and the Phillies lost the World Series. Between the recession and the Yankees’ superior rotation, all three of these things are likely to come to pass once again over the next couple of weeks.
  • Chase Utley wasn’t hurt, but thank God he had the time off to heal. Confused? You won’t be after this week’s episode of “Soap!”
  • Adrian Gonzalez is probably on his way out of San Diego.
  • You know, Kyle Farnsworth is tall, was once young and could once throw around 100 m.p.h. too, and I didn’t see anyone offering hm $40 million.
  • There are a lot of ignorant and disturbed people in Chicago. In unrelated news, some idiot racists send hate mail to black Cubs’ players.
  • Selig is “delighted” that McGwire is back in the game. I wish I had a transcript of his reaction to the Congressional testimony back in 2005.
  • The best book over at that blog has to be Why our Children Drink. Points will be awarded to the best answers to that question in the comments.

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    Comments

    1. ecp said...

      “Kyle Farnsworth is tall, was once young and could once throw around 100 m.p.h. too, and I didn’t see anyone offering hm $40 million.”

      Dayton Moore isn’t done with him yet; give it time.

    2. Pete Toms said...

      I think your Mets/Chapman quote is bang on….if the Mets are skimping on fall instrucitonal league in Port St. Lucie doesn’t seem reasonable that they are pursuing Chapman…

    3. Rob² said...

      Why Are Children Drink?  This is a trick question, right?  Can the answer be anything other than “To get drunk.”

    4. YankeesfanLen said...

      “Why Our Children Drink”-
      a) lactose intolerance
      b) parents are Phillie Phans
      c) hacked into electronic liquor cabinet

      I think you might have missed something on the upcoming Chapman sweeps- he may well end up on the White Sox or Tigers for a year before the big guns come after him.  Nice Farnsy reference, Frenchie still is awaiting membership approval at Westchester G.C. Or maybe Islip MiniPutt.

      Lastly, TigersfanRob called last night and was cautiously asking what I thought of the McGwire addition to the Cards staff, thinking I might be a chest thumping steroids “purist” like so many beat writers seem to be.  My response:“That’s soooooo 2005”

    5. Alex K said...

      I’ll give ralph +100.  That is the most memorable commercial from my childhood. I’m actually a little sad I didn’t think of it.

    6. michael standish said...

      I believe it was Sigmund Freud who pointed out that children drink for the same reason that dogs lick their testicles.

    7. The Rabbit said...

      Thanks Craig….I’ve just scratched the surface at the link you provided. I know I’m going to end up killing the whole day.

    8. Mode:Theif and Lair said...

      .. because the heroes they chose, Derek Jeter and Mariano Rivera, have been shown to be liars, thieves, and cheaters. Again Craig, it’s your fault.

      /sorry, I think any points you’ve been holding on to for other answers sould be given to ralph

    9. Jack Marshall said...

      Re: the Padres. Craig: Shouldn’t this be seen as a conflict of interest situation? I don’t believe Towers could trade Gonzalez to the Sox without raising questions about his loyalties and objectivity. By traditional COI principles, he should remove himself from any trade discussions involving Boston. I know this never happens, and I know it won’t. But if Towers wanted to start a good precedent for the future, this would be a way.

    10. Paul said...

      They drink because there’s only 1 copy of “state of the art robot catalog” at the library and 1 copy is hardly enough to go around.

    11. Kahuna Tuna said...

      They drink because of the Northeast, with its tiny states and multiple accents and snow.

      (I’m splitting these points with Aaron.)

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