I got a letter in the mail on Saturday addressed to “Craig Calcaterra, Shysterball.” Inside was a mint condition 1978 Topps Bucky Dent card. No return address. No note, no nothing else accompanying it. New York City postmark. Typewritten address label. Hurm.
I haven’t died in the last 48 hours, so I’m ruling out anthrax attack. Bucky Dent hasn’t died in that time either, so, for the time being at least, I’m (sadly) ruling out a baseball-themed serial killer tipping me off to his victims as part of an elaborate cat-and-mouse game. It could be some kind of occult thing in which someone has substituted the Cardboard Gods for the traditional tarot deck with Bucky Dent as the Death Card, but anyone who would take the time to do that would probably not have used a business envelope and probably would have sealed it with wax because that’s just kind of how those people roll. Out of an abundance of caution, however, I have sent the police to Josh Wilker’s house.
I appreciate the card, actually. It’s kind of cool, and if whoever sent it intended it as a gift, thank you. I worry, however, that someone sent it to me in an effort to anger me, mistakenly thinking that I’m a Red Sox fan. If that was the intent, you have failed. I met Bucky Dent at spring training in 1982 and he was really nice to my brother and I. He also spent some time in Columbus managing the Clippers, and by all accounts was a nice addition to the community. I’ve got no ill-will towards Dent, so I do hope no one’s deviousness was wasted.
Part of me doesn’t want to find out who sent it because mysteries are fun. But I must admit that I remain perplexed this morning.
UPDATE: Pinto got a George Scott the other day. The folks at Purple Row got a Bucky Dent too. As David mentions in the comments, this smells like viral marketing. Without looking it up, I wonder if a book is coming out about the Yankees-Red Sox rivalry.
UPDATE II: Will Carroll got a Steve Swisher. Maybe this is viral marketing for Wilker’s book?