And That Happened

Rangers 10, Tigers 4: So much for pitching porn. Darvish wasn’t exactly sharp early but he ultimately settled down. Meanwhile, who put the benzedrine in Mr. Verlander’s Ovaltine? He was a hot mess. And I do mean hot. He was lighting up the radar gun in the early innings but was overthrowing and seemed to have no idea where the ball was going. Just a mechanical disaster, really, unlike I’ve ever remembered seeing him. Darvish ended up going eight innings and improving to 7-1.

Mariners 3, Yankees 2: Andy Pettitte left with a muscle injury. Andy Pettitte is 40. So basically, this is his life now (warning: a bit of bad language, but if you’re 40, you NEED to hear this because it’s 100 percent true).

Mets 5, Cardinals 2: The Mets end a six-game skid behind five hits from Daniel Murphy and David Wright. From the AP gamer about Jon Niese:

Terry Collins thought it was no coincidence the lefty rediscovered his groove in shirt-sleeve weather and paved the way for the New York Mets’ slump-buster.

That word he used: I do not think it means what he thinks it means.

Pirates 7, Brewers 1: Travis Snider hit a 458-foot homer that ended up in the Allegheny River. Snider went 3 for 5 with three RBI and the Pirates won their sixth of seven.

Red Sox 4, Rays 3: Down 3-1 in the ninth, the Red Sox loaded the bases off Fernando Rodney, and Will Middlebrooks cleared them with a double. Just bananas. Oh, sorry Fernando, not bananas at all. Rodney has already blown three saves this year. He blew only two last year.

Reds 5, Marlins 3: [Craig press three keys and his “The ____ sweep the Marlins” macro is activated]. This one was competitive at least, as Mat Latos ran out of gas in the ninth and Aroldis Chapman couldn’t close the deal either, sending it to extras. Brandon Phillips, who had homered earlier, hit a sac fly for the go-ahead run in the 10th.

Giants 8, Rockies 6: Down 6-0 early, the Giants put up five in the fourth and three in the sixth. I didn’t see the broadcast, but I’m gonna assume the announcers said “no lead is safe in Coors Field” approximately five times. San Francisco has beaten Colorado 10 straight times.

White Sox 5, Angels 4: Yet another rally on a night that seemed to have many of them. The Sox were down two in the eighth when they scored three. The go-ahead run came on a bases-loaded walk to Jeff Keppinger, who had not walked in over 140 plate appearances so far this year.

Nationals 6, Padres 2: Stephen Strasburg pitched eight innings allowing only one earned run. Bryce Harper shook off his ailments from the fence collision in L.A. and hit a 432 foot homer in the seventh.